Two days ago i was clueless not having any certain idea wat to write about because alot was going on lately...but as i thought to myself about the special persons in my life and the friends am most thankfull for....i came out with this kind of weird writing about you!:p....:
"Dear you.
I seriously dont know what to call this or how to describe it,but i think this is just when you meet some people in your life who take your breath away by just being in it,and shes one of those people!
Our friendship just started this summer actually after a camp we attended together,wish i would have taken this chance better to spend more time with her and getting to know her.But i didnt waste any chances after that,and now she is one of my best friends and one of the people i wanna die before.
She is really one of those people who change your life by just being in it.I cant wait everyday for our funny long lasting and kind of useless phone calls,they just make my day!
Talking to her makes me happy and kind of different,seeing her makes me really proud to point at her and say,that girl people is my friend!
Everything in her is just beautiful ,especially her soul.She is that kind of a person who has a good sense of humor,and thats one of the reasons why i call her whenever am crying or feeling down for no reason,because simply she just knows how to put a smile on my face.I dont really know how you could love and trust someone you never knew before so fast and for no certain reason and with no conditions.But hey,if i went on more into details in describing her great personality and what she means to me,i wont stop till the morning thn.
To be honest i dont really know why i wrote that ,but i think i just wanted to describe my happiness and appriciation for having such a friend like her.Manal Seoudy i cant imagine one day without you,and thats why you are on top of my list of the people i wanna die before....i love you my dearest friend,i honestly do!"
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Getting ahead of everythng!
Changing the game while playing by my rules,thats what I decided for this year!
This school year and the coming one are the last one and the most important. Now it's all about scoring and controlling the game and playing hard.First of all I know I have to play with self-confidence and self-esteem otherwise the rounds are gonna be hard to pass.I allowed myself to fail once,but i dont really like to call it failing as I dont really believe in failing.It was just a stupid mistake from which i learned the taste of being down of the list.And here I am climbing and scoring as much as I can,it only comes thru this little secret called"Hard-Workin".
Never really aimed for Perfection,just aiming for getting proud and deserving high respect.So here I am,thru this writing am awaking the faith I've inside me,cheering myself alittle bit,and remembering myself that it is all in my hand and it was all my decision after all.
Trust me when I say,am not gonna let anyone shake the faith and believe I've or even tryn to get me down.And as I know myself,I know that I sould take it as a challenge or a battle otherwise am gonna get lazy,so am hoping am gonna like my preformance on this battlefield of life.."ABITUR" here I am!
This school year and the coming one are the last one and the most important. Now it's all about scoring and controlling the game and playing hard.First of all I know I have to play with self-confidence and self-esteem otherwise the rounds are gonna be hard to pass.I allowed myself to fail once,but i dont really like to call it failing as I dont really believe in failing.It was just a stupid mistake from which i learned the taste of being down of the list.And here I am climbing and scoring as much as I can,it only comes thru this little secret called"Hard-Workin".
Never really aimed for Perfection,just aiming for getting proud and deserving high respect.So here I am,thru this writing am awaking the faith I've inside me,cheering myself alittle bit,and remembering myself that it is all in my hand and it was all my decision after all.
Trust me when I say,am not gonna let anyone shake the faith and believe I've or even tryn to get me down.And as I know myself,I know that I sould take it as a challenge or a battle otherwise am gonna get lazy,so am hoping am gonna like my preformance on this battlefield of life.."ABITUR" here I am!
Saturday, October 10, 2009
My unknownbody<3
It was friday night at 10.30pm I was home alone when this story started.
I was reading one of my favourite books'Twilight',its a romantic story that takes your imagination far away.After a while I stopped reading and decided to enjoy the silence and the opportunity of being alone to fall deeply in my thoughts.
I was layin back on my couch enjoying the darkness with only a small light coming from the back of my room,hearing nothing but the Clock's sound as time passes by.
I realized slowely that I was out of time and place,but I could see I was standing in the middle of a garden watching two people talking together.
As i took a step closer I realized they cant feel me nor feel my presence,and so I decided to take a closer look at the girls face first.
And here I am standing out of nowhere,looking at a girl that I realized wasnt a stranger at all,to my shock it was ME,and not anyother girl,but who was that boy thn.
I took a closer look at his face too,but nothing came on my mind,I dont know him at all.
As I started paying more attention to their conversation,I realized there was something wrong with them,they werent just two normal people talking to eachother.
While he talked to her,his eyes said it all how much he cared for her,and I could feel how happy I felt about it without even knowing a reason for my happiness.
And she started talkin and saying:
' you dont know what u mean to me,am glad i have you in my life' and she smiled again..'I cant imagine myself anymore without you,you are the air that i breath..without you i'd be lost!' and she stopped for a while as he took her hand and put it on his heart and said:'Can you feel those heartbeats...as long as they go on,know that i love you,and after they stop know that my soul wont leave you!'
Tears of happiness fall down her face on her hand and they both smiled.
To me standing there and watchin their happiness i envied them but it felt very good knowing that thers such a thing that exsits.
Slowely I felt something grabbing me from the back as the picture of the two started to fade away.I opend my eyes and there I was back again to the real world,back to the darkness of my room and the silence of the night.
But I felt different,I felt more happy.
As I woke up more from this dream I realized that I fall in love with the UNKNOWNBODY of my dreams<3
I was reading one of my favourite books'Twilight',its a romantic story that takes your imagination far away.After a while I stopped reading and decided to enjoy the silence and the opportunity of being alone to fall deeply in my thoughts.
I was layin back on my couch enjoying the darkness with only a small light coming from the back of my room,hearing nothing but the Clock's sound as time passes by.
I realized slowely that I was out of time and place,but I could see I was standing in the middle of a garden watching two people talking together.
As i took a step closer I realized they cant feel me nor feel my presence,and so I decided to take a closer look at the girls face first.
And here I am standing out of nowhere,looking at a girl that I realized wasnt a stranger at all,to my shock it was ME,and not anyother girl,but who was that boy thn.
I took a closer look at his face too,but nothing came on my mind,I dont know him at all.
As I started paying more attention to their conversation,I realized there was something wrong with them,they werent just two normal people talking to eachother.
While he talked to her,his eyes said it all how much he cared for her,and I could feel how happy I felt about it without even knowing a reason for my happiness.
And she started talkin and saying:
' you dont know what u mean to me,am glad i have you in my life' and she smiled again..'I cant imagine myself anymore without you,you are the air that i breath..without you i'd be lost!' and she stopped for a while as he took her hand and put it on his heart and said:'Can you feel those heartbeats...as long as they go on,know that i love you,and after they stop know that my soul wont leave you!'
Tears of happiness fall down her face on her hand and they both smiled.
To me standing there and watchin their happiness i envied them but it felt very good knowing that thers such a thing that exsits.
Slowely I felt something grabbing me from the back as the picture of the two started to fade away.I opend my eyes and there I was back again to the real world,back to the darkness of my room and the silence of the night.
But I felt different,I felt more happy.
As I woke up more from this dream I realized that I fall in love with the UNKNOWNBODY of my dreams<3
Friday, August 21, 2009
The Clearness in the Sky
Hey long time not writing,and that was because I didn't know what could be a good topic to write about at this time.
Today is one day before Ramadan starts and so I decided to share with you my happiness and my joyfulness about this month.And as I am Egyptian and have always lived here in my country I can tell you through what I saw and lived till now,how we celebrate and welcome this month every year.
Clearness is what you will find when your eyes catch the sky especially at midnight,and eventually you will feel how clear your heart is too at that moment.
Peacefulness fills in the air and also the atmosphere in general.
Seeing the lights and decorations on the streets shows how much we wait for this month to come.
And yes the streets are not empty at all at that time of the year but still we can take it with patience and after eating time than it is our Reward for our patience...and that is that, you wont find anyone one the streets!
Minutes before Eating some people stand on the street and make sure that every car or person that passes by gets a small snack to break their fasting with.
In my opinion that shows how much we care about each other.
The family gatherings and being everyday at my grandmas place,is the most thing i love and appreciate this month for.Seeing my family everyday,and thats because we eat at my grandmas place with also my aunts family,means the world to me because its a beyond words feeling.And am sure you get this feeling too when your with your beloved ones,your Family!
In spite of all these spiritual atmosphere,positive things and the happiness in the air..I was surprised when my mom told me about Ramadan back at her time,because I realized how much the traditions in the Egyptian Society are changing slowly through the Generations,but still lets always hope for the best and look at the bright side.
So talking about the Greatness of this month would be endless and so I only shared with you some of the reasons why it makes that month so great and why it brings joyfulness with it,from my own point of view.I hope you can feel it with me too..
And Ramadan Karim to all Muslims all over the world.
Today is one day before Ramadan starts and so I decided to share with you my happiness and my joyfulness about this month.And as I am Egyptian and have always lived here in my country I can tell you through what I saw and lived till now,how we celebrate and welcome this month every year.
Clearness is what you will find when your eyes catch the sky especially at midnight,and eventually you will feel how clear your heart is too at that moment.
Peacefulness fills in the air and also the atmosphere in general.
Seeing the lights and decorations on the streets shows how much we wait for this month to come.
And yes the streets are not empty at all at that time of the year but still we can take it with patience and after eating time than it is our Reward for our patience...and that is that, you wont find anyone one the streets!
Minutes before Eating some people stand on the street and make sure that every car or person that passes by gets a small snack to break their fasting with.
In my opinion that shows how much we care about each other.
The family gatherings and being everyday at my grandmas place,is the most thing i love and appreciate this month for.Seeing my family everyday,and thats because we eat at my grandmas place with also my aunts family,means the world to me because its a beyond words feeling.And am sure you get this feeling too when your with your beloved ones,your Family!
In spite of all these spiritual atmosphere,positive things and the happiness in the air..I was surprised when my mom told me about Ramadan back at her time,because I realized how much the traditions in the Egyptian Society are changing slowly through the Generations,but still lets always hope for the best and look at the bright side.
So talking about the Greatness of this month would be endless and so I only shared with you some of the reasons why it makes that month so great and why it brings joyfulness with it,from my own point of view.I hope you can feel it with me too..
And Ramadan Karim to all Muslims all over the world.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
You used to be!
Feeling destroyed inside is the worse feeling ur emotions can ever feel...because its just beyond everything.
You feel like you dont wanna live anymore or actually u feel sick of people.
Your used to be alot of thing,but now your not and you dont even care about losing the good in you.
You used to be funny and smilying all the time,and now your just depressed the whole time and whenever u look in a mirror you see your sad eyes.
You used to be sociable but now you just wanna stay away from people and be alone the whole time.
And its like you have no one to tell all these things and feelings,because your feeling lonely...but hey thats not true!
If you just think about it for a minute your the one whos making your ownslef lonely...just look around you and you see all the people who care about you and forget about the ones who made you feel pain...
Your not used to be ,you still are, your just taking a break and refreshing your inside feeling.
And remember its never to late for anything and dont you dare say
"I USED TO BE...."have faith and believe that "YOU STILL ARE AND WILL ALWAYS BE!"
You feel like you dont wanna live anymore or actually u feel sick of people.
Your used to be alot of thing,but now your not and you dont even care about losing the good in you.
You used to be funny and smilying all the time,and now your just depressed the whole time and whenever u look in a mirror you see your sad eyes.
You used to be sociable but now you just wanna stay away from people and be alone the whole time.
And its like you have no one to tell all these things and feelings,because your feeling lonely...but hey thats not true!
If you just think about it for a minute your the one whos making your ownslef lonely...just look around you and you see all the people who care about you and forget about the ones who made you feel pain...
Your not used to be ,you still are, your just taking a break and refreshing your inside feeling.
And remember its never to late for anything and dont you dare say
"I USED TO BE...."have faith and believe that "YOU STILL ARE AND WILL ALWAYS BE!"
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
They call it their miracle
"It's amazing so let me tell u about it,because i call it my miracl."thats how our conversation started and i knew she would start talkin' about him.We were on the beach and it was sunset and u could hear the waves slowely moving,she's my best friend and my only true friend.Before i started listening i took alook at her face and thats when i saw it in her eyes,they were shinning,and i could figure out why,because she would start talkin' about him.
"U know it's out of my hands that I'm the kind of person who has alot of self-confidence and self-love,but am glad i use it right"...'yes thats true' that was the first thing that came on my mind when i first met her 9years ago.
"I was and i always will be proud of who I am,I could be sometimes selfish and choose myself over others,and thats because I value myself alot.
But now everything changed.I still think the same and everything but now HE'S also there."......and i could guess the rest of the conversation but still i wanted 2 know how much he changes her in a good way everyday!
"From the very first time I saw him,I felt like something was weird.like I knew him long time ago...and when we talked just randomly infront of our friends everything he said about himself i kept saying 'yeah me to,thats exactelly what i also do',than i realized that it sounded very stupid of me especially infront of the people.
But it was so true he's my male version we've identical minds and also identical character.
He started changing me slowely without he even noticed...for the first time i feel so proud that i know someone like him...
He's the only person on earth whom i never forget anything of what he says to me...He's also the only person from whom i learn everything not because i have to or something just because i want to."
Well that was something i heard for the first time from her,she never told me about all these facts...so i was excited about what will come next.
"For him I would do anything I would choose him over myself with no doubt..and I really mean it...I would tarde the whole world to reach him and travel the seven sees to see him...
Maybe this whole would sound alittle bit over and that there could be nothing like that...but i trust how much u believe me"than she looked in my eyes and i saw her tearing when she saw the smile on my face because i was happy to hear that from her.
"As u know some people own some miracles,and am glad he is my miracle and i am his.
I wouldnt want anything more than this,it makes me so happy and secure that i am growing up with him.Sometimes i even feel like he's raising me up or something"..than she smiled and u could see how blessed she was.
"waking up every morning and knowing that he's somewhere out there,makes my day.
I cant live in a world where he doesnt exist because am crazy about him in every possible way"
Silence was the only thing u could feel at that moment and the smiles on our faces....and i was thinking to myself if they call it their miracle will i ever call someone my miracle...and that's when we saw him coming towords us and i knew it was time for me to find my own miracle!
"U know it's out of my hands that I'm the kind of person who has alot of self-confidence and self-love,but am glad i use it right"...'yes thats true' that was the first thing that came on my mind when i first met her 9years ago.
"I was and i always will be proud of who I am,I could be sometimes selfish and choose myself over others,and thats because I value myself alot.
But now everything changed.I still think the same and everything but now HE'S also there."......and i could guess the rest of the conversation but still i wanted 2 know how much he changes her in a good way everyday!
"From the very first time I saw him,I felt like something was weird.like I knew him long time ago...and when we talked just randomly infront of our friends everything he said about himself i kept saying 'yeah me to,thats exactelly what i also do',than i realized that it sounded very stupid of me especially infront of the people.
But it was so true he's my male version we've identical minds and also identical character.
He started changing me slowely without he even noticed...for the first time i feel so proud that i know someone like him...
He's the only person on earth whom i never forget anything of what he says to me...He's also the only person from whom i learn everything not because i have to or something just because i want to."
Well that was something i heard for the first time from her,she never told me about all these facts...so i was excited about what will come next.
"For him I would do anything I would choose him over myself with no doubt..and I really mean it...I would tarde the whole world to reach him and travel the seven sees to see him...
Maybe this whole would sound alittle bit over and that there could be nothing like that...but i trust how much u believe me"than she looked in my eyes and i saw her tearing when she saw the smile on my face because i was happy to hear that from her.
"As u know some people own some miracles,and am glad he is my miracle and i am his.
I wouldnt want anything more than this,it makes me so happy and secure that i am growing up with him.Sometimes i even feel like he's raising me up or something"..than she smiled and u could see how blessed she was.
"waking up every morning and knowing that he's somewhere out there,makes my day.
I cant live in a world where he doesnt exist because am crazy about him in every possible way"
Silence was the only thing u could feel at that moment and the smiles on our faces....and i was thinking to myself if they call it their miracle will i ever call someone my miracle...and that's when we saw him coming towords us and i knew it was time for me to find my own miracle!
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
It's all about yourself
Let me start by asking how many times in the day do u hear a voice inside ur head talking and telling u,why dont u go and do that(whatever it is depends on the mood)..and how many times do u ignore that voice or just dont pay attention to it!!
Well let me tell u smth tht,thts not a stranger talkin to u or something,thats ur ownself talkin to u..thats the inside u the real u!!
Not everyone actually gets to hear himself or even think that way,because that may sound crazy to some people.We always concentrate on the outside us more than the inside. So why not start working on the inside and letting it out,better thn it is kept inside like a prisoner and am sure that the inside of everyone is 100times better and beautiful than the outside,because simply its just real,its totally u,not wat your trying to be or what u are already pretending to be. Everyone is special in something or even more so who not try to find it and share it with people and work on it...before time goes by and thn it will be too late and trust me regret doesnt feel that good to try it....
Some people feel lost inside and they feel like they still dont know who they really are,I think those people are not wrong or something they just never got to look and see deep inside them,they never tried to hear the inner voice or feel what their heart wants or already has....so being alot lonely lately was very usefull for myself because i got to know and understand who i really are....
So it's now ur time to discover youresl more and see the result and am sure u ll be surprised of how much u have inside u.....so let it out!
Well let me tell u smth tht,thts not a stranger talkin to u or something,thats ur ownself talkin to u..thats the inside u the real u!!
Not everyone actually gets to hear himself or even think that way,because that may sound crazy to some people.We always concentrate on the outside us more than the inside. So why not start working on the inside and letting it out,better thn it is kept inside like a prisoner and am sure that the inside of everyone is 100times better and beautiful than the outside,because simply its just real,its totally u,not wat your trying to be or what u are already pretending to be. Everyone is special in something or even more so who not try to find it and share it with people and work on it...before time goes by and thn it will be too late and trust me regret doesnt feel that good to try it....
Some people feel lost inside and they feel like they still dont know who they really are,I think those people are not wrong or something they just never got to look and see deep inside them,they never tried to hear the inner voice or feel what their heart wants or already has....so being alot lonely lately was very usefull for myself because i got to know and understand who i really are....
So it's now ur time to discover youresl more and see the result and am sure u ll be surprised of how much u have inside u.....so let it out!
Do i really have two sides in me?
Sometimes I think that I've two sides in me,like two girls living in one body..
Maybe I should start speaking about the inside one because not anyone gets to know this Me except my close ones,like u for example!!!
So this is the wise Girl in me,the one that thinks alot befor she talks or acts,cause she s a deep thinker.She's the one that makes my parents proud and herself for sure.She's like a serious version of Me,but the only thing is that she is a brokenheartd girl.
She's also the one that writes deep from the heart,it s not like i write everytime i want to I only write when I feel like a different person inside me wants to talk,just like now..
So i was saying she's inspired the whole time,she always has dreams for her future,she wants a big career,she doesnt wnat to be forgoten after she dies,she's the one that want to change something,Because she believes and she has faith.
When it comes to friendship she only has three friends,her best friends.They are the one that she always talks to,that she only laugh with and thats because she doesnt laugh alot,just btw thats because shes broken hearted.
They are also the ones that make her love life and give her the push 2 the next step.
So about the other girl in Me,the one that everyone sees,she's not a senstive one,always laughing and doesnt care about alot of things.Shes the one that talks alot,that loves everything and everyone,and she's trying to find her own fun,she's the one who hates studying or being serious,she is always noisy and remarkable.
She dances to loud music a loot and sings with it,eventho she knows how bad her voice is,she simply doesnt Care!!
I think most of my friends love this version of Me more...
So at the end I'll just admit it they are two different personalities,a wise one and a too sociable one,living both in one body,which belongs to me,myself...
LOL i knw this sounds crazy but its totally true am just like this and if u looked deep inside u, u ll find the same......
Maybe I should start speaking about the inside one because not anyone gets to know this Me except my close ones,like u for example!!!
So this is the wise Girl in me,the one that thinks alot befor she talks or acts,cause she s a deep thinker.She's the one that makes my parents proud and herself for sure.She's like a serious version of Me,but the only thing is that she is a brokenheartd girl.
She's also the one that writes deep from the heart,it s not like i write everytime i want to I only write when I feel like a different person inside me wants to talk,just like now..
So i was saying she's inspired the whole time,she always has dreams for her future,she wants a big career,she doesnt wnat to be forgoten after she dies,she's the one that want to change something,Because she believes and she has faith.
When it comes to friendship she only has three friends,her best friends.They are the one that she always talks to,that she only laugh with and thats because she doesnt laugh alot,just btw thats because shes broken hearted.
They are also the ones that make her love life and give her the push 2 the next step.
So about the other girl in Me,the one that everyone sees,she's not a senstive one,always laughing and doesnt care about alot of things.Shes the one that talks alot,that loves everything and everyone,and she's trying to find her own fun,she's the one who hates studying or being serious,she is always noisy and remarkable.
She dances to loud music a loot and sings with it,eventho she knows how bad her voice is,she simply doesnt Care!!
I think most of my friends love this version of Me more...
So at the end I'll just admit it they are two different personalities,a wise one and a too sociable one,living both in one body,which belongs to me,myself...
LOL i knw this sounds crazy but its totally true am just like this and if u looked deep inside u, u ll find the same......
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